Bereavement Gift Instead of Flowers

Funeral gift etiquette
When you first become aware that someone has passed away, your first instinct is to send a gift to the deceased’s family in their time of grief, but make sure you know and follow good funeral gift etiquette according to their culture. There is a variety of gifts that you might consider sending to the sorrowful family that will ease their pain and send the message that your thoughts are with them in their time of hardship.

Food: Perhaps the most welcome gift during a time of grief is that of food. Whether you have meals delivered or drop by with a casserole, the message is that you are caring of the family’s loss. However, be insightful about intruding on the family’s time when bringing the gift. A brief visit of about 15 minutes is appropriate to deliver the food and express condolences. Proper funeral gift etiquette for food is to offer items that require little preparation, such as a sympathy gift basket or a comfort food gift basket. Even if you judge that many people will bring food, your bereavement gift basket will last of many weeks without being opened since all the items are shelf stable.

Flowers: The most widespread funeral gift is flowers. Before you send any, find out if there are certain conditions for memoral service flowers depending on the religious affiliation of the deceased. For example, Jewish funeral traditions don’t integrate flowers while other gifts are considered more fitting. Others, such as Hindus or Muslims, don’t consider funeral flowers as traditional, but the gesture may be seen as caring by certain groups. Funeral flowers for a Catholic, LDS or Buddhist funerals are correct and welcomed. Consult a florist if you have any doubts, they will be well versed in varioustraditions for funerals.

Gifts to Charity: Memorial gifts are a popular custom that allows money that would normally be spent on expensive floral arrangements to be chosen for a specific organization, charity or event. By and large, the family will publish a preferred charity in the funeral announcement and request donations in lieu of gifts. Don’t breach funeral gift etiquette by sending flowers if the family has specifically asked not to.

After the Funeral: Funeral gift etiquette also allows friends and family members to send a fruit and cheese gift basket in the days and years following a loss. A sincere card or memento on the anniversary of the death sends the message that you care about family members and remember their loss. Even visiting with family members a few weeks after the funeral with a meal or a potted plant can have a big impact on the grieving heart.

Funeral gift etiquette suggests that family members send a thank you card for the bereavement gift baskets or services they received during a time of grief, don’t be offended if you don’t receive one at all or if it arrives several weeks or months after the funeral. When someone is dealing with grief, time can slip by hastily.


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